THE LITTLE BOY AND THE OLD MAN

The Little Boy

I drove out to Canyon Country, a suburb north of The Valley, located in the sleepy hick paradise of Valencia. Over a decade ago I lived up in Canyon Country with my mother and my stepdad. I made some friends up there but I have since lost touch with them.

The reason I drove up there was to play bass for my friend Angel's cover band. Angel is the guitarist for ICON, one of the bands I'm in. He likes heavy metal, specifically hair metal bands. I know how to play these absurdly simple songs, and so I have been asked to help out.

The '80's never died in Canyon Country, just like they never died in Newhall or Saugus or Simi Valley. In fact, it can be argued that the '80's didn't die at all-- it just retired to Valencia.

I met the band: Andy, the singer, a dead ringer for Randy Quaid in Kingpin, right down to the hair... but Andy is not going for Amish chic-- he's a rocker to the end.

Then there was Joe, the drummer, a real barroom bruiser, who pounds the skins like his life depends on it. These guys were cracker hellraisers in their youth and now they only want to rock and drink beer.

I'm cool with it.

We played Motley Crue, Andy's favorite band. We played Poison. We dabbled in Alice In Chains and have plans to maybe cover Twisted Sister.

Afterwards, Andy brought out his 8 year-old son, fresh from a talent show at his school across the street. The little dude played "Rock And Roll All Nite" by KISS as we jammed along. The kid hit all the right parts. In ten years, he'll be a killer on the drums.


The Old Man


During a smoke break, we sat around and talked about what we wanted out of this band. One simple reason unites all of us: money. Andy made no bones about it, he wants to make cash, because the bars up in Canyon Country all want cover bands who play these types of tunes.

I know the demand of hair metal. Even though I hated the music when I was growing up, as I got older I realized that knowing how to play "Heaven Isn't Too Far Away" by Warrant could get me laid. It was my "trashy-blonde-whore" phase, and all it took was knowing how to play the chorus of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" to get the panties moist...

However, Andy might be using the money thing as a mask for his true feelings. This guy has a hell of a metal voice, and around his home I saw evidence of rabid fandom: rubber duckies in the bathroom with the faces of KISS on them; posters of Guns 'N' Roses in the garage where we rehearsed; his son's crayon drawing of Motley Crue, in full make-up...

But the most telling moment was when a friend of Andy's son complimented us on our run-through of "Girl Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)".

Andy looked at the kid with a dead serious eye and asked, "Did we sound like the Crue?"

The kid nodded. Andy smiled and gave him a thumbs up.

That made me grin for some reason. Andy's in his 40s, and is a really nice person with a sincere love for music. Even though it's not my style or genre, I can dig on his vibe. I sometimes feel the same way about my beloved rock heroes.


The Little Boy


Driving back to the freeway after the rehearsal, I passed a street that I once used to walk down. On this street lived a girl named Wendy whom I was friends with, and I was startled to find that I remembered where her house was after a decade.

I drove by, knowing in my heart that she wouldn't be there... or would she?

I passed by and saw a group of people on the front lawn, congregating as if ready to go out somehwere. I saw, in the dim light, a girl with blazing blue eyes, just like Wendy's eyes. When I circled around, I found that they were all loading into someone's truck. They were probably going to go to a bar.

I passed by once more, to see that they had left.

Next time I'm up there rehearsing, I think I will stop by Wendy's house. It wouldn't surprise me to find out that she still lived with her parents. She was a great girl.

I started thinking about my friends over the years, and how I should've spent more time with people like Wendy instead of some of the people I stuck with, the ones who betrayed me and broke my heart.

I realized that I was still hurt by the whole Sharky/Eve thing. But this time, I knew it was because I was holding my emotions in, stuck in the Old Man mode where tears are for wusses, and real men don't cry...

A torrent erupted from my eyes when I got home. I made myself dwell upon the pain and the hurt until, finally, after all these years, I let it all out.

I fell asleep around 4 AM.


The Old Man


I woke up with an urge to call Eve and invite her to breakfast.

Two weeks earlier, she had stopped by and I got the vibe that she wanted to spend some time with me. It didn't feel right to me, though. But when I woke up I just had this urge to call her. She picked up the phone and sounded happy to see me.

She came over and we went to Andre's. She pulled out a Tarot deck and proceeded to read my fortune. Her reading was pretty reflective of my current state of mind.

She joked about how her mother still thinks she is a witch. I told her that I imagined she had perceptive powers that were beyond the ordinary, but I didn't tell her why I felt that way.

We chatted. I informed her that, according to her request, she will be the Associate Producer on the animation, when a budget comes through. This made her happy.

I told her I saw Dick a few times as I was driving from work last week. She told me that he has been bothering her lately, and that she hears he is a full-blown alcoholic now. She beat herself up for not being able to help him but I reminded her that she spent many years of her life trying to get him to change. I told her not to lose her compassion but also not to let it eat her up.

We watched Miami play New Jersey when we got back to my place. After a while, I realized that she wanted to spend the whole day with me, or at least until she had to go home to get some sleep.

The game was boring, livened up only by our sharp banter over Shaq's value as a player. Then, I proposed that we take a drive out to Amoeba Records. She looked at me and said, "As long as we're not there for four hours..."


The Little Boy


The weather was beautiful on Sunday. If my car was a convertible, the top would've surely been down, and the California sun would've massaged its way into our hearts and minds with little effort.

Hollywood was alive and jumping as we found parking a block away. I gave a bum a dollar. Eve told me about her Friday night, holding up the wall at a dance club. We traded small glimpses into our respective lovelives, to test the waters, to see if the other was heavy into a relationship or something.

I resisted the temptation to run amok. I found what I was looking for-- the new Kings Of Leon disc --plus I scored on a marked-down version of The Kids Are Alright, the legendary documentary about The Who. Eve bought Beck's new album, Guero.

We chatted with the clerks as they rang up our orders.

Female Clerk: (to Eve) I like your shirt.

Eve: Thanks.

Male Clerk: Oh, it says 'Flintstones'... I thought it was a Ramones shirt!

Me: So did I! It looks like the Ramones seal...

Female Clerk: We women notice these things. Men aren't as attentive.

Male Clerk: (putting his arms around the female clerk) You don't really mean that, do ya?

Eve: Yes, she did. (laughs)

Me: (to the female clerk as she took off her jacket) I noticed your shirt-- '100% Sugar Free'... see? We're not that inattentive!

Female Clerk: Yeah, I guess you're okay...

(Laughter all around)

We made a stop at Eve's place to grab some DVDs and some weed. Then, I stopped at the liquor store and bought rolling papers and a six-pack of Newcastle. We laughed at how ready we were to resume our hang-out rituals.

We watched The Incredibles on DVD and then we ordered pizza. We watched The Simpsons' 350th episode, as well as some of the other shows that followed.

It was really nice and comfortable.


The Old Man


We did not have sex. It's too soon for any of that. I'm still trying to get used to everything.

I've written here in the past that Eve is like a drug to me. I cannot go cold turkey with it. But, I also can't relapse. Thus, our Sunday was like a fix of Methadone, trying to wean ourselves off of the hard stuff.

We spent a lot of time not talking. This might scare other people, but for me it was a relief. I think a lot of the things that drive us apart stem from nervous chatter, our respective need to fill the empty spaces of conversation.

I think Sunday was just two people who are ridiculously attracted to each other, checking in and making sure the other is okay. I could tell she was fishing for some kind of sign that I was involved with someone else. She hinted to me that she'd been on blind dates, and that they were not her cup of tea. I admitted to her that a certain girl we both know probably does like me as more than friend. Eve smiled and said, "See? I told you. She gave me that mean look. I could tell she was jealous of me." She felt cocksure, not just because she called it, but because she knows that I have no interest in this certain girl, and she can rest a bit easier...

One day at a time, John Lennon once sang, is all we do.

One day at a time is good for you.

When she left, I drove out to Paulie's place. I was supposed to be there eariler, but I staved it off because I wanted to spend time with Eve. Too many times, I put her on hold or forced her to go along with me, when she'd rather just be with me and no one else. I held my tongue when Paulie called me, hoping he would understand that I just needed this time with her, just for now. He has my attention every other moment of the week, but just this one time I needed to focus only on her.

I handled it well. I think I'm getting better at dealing with the needs of others.

And I think I'm learning to balance the two sides of my soul, the Little Boy and the Old Man. No one ever said it was easy.

Right now, I'm still the Old Man, but by the end of the evening I will be the Little Boy again. We'll see how the rest of the day goes.

No, I didn't want to write another online novel chapter, but it doesn't mean it's over. Tomorrow, perhaps... not that any of you (besides Butterscotch) read that thing to begin with...

I might post later.